The 3 Different Types of Stalkers

1. The Passive Stalker

This person creeps into your backyard and watches your nightly rituals and activities. This person could be living a very normal existence in the eyes of society and wants to keep it that way. They are merely voyeurs, with a keen interest in what goes on behind other people's closed doors. This person will camouflage themselves in your backyard and study your behaviour, how you act when you think you are completely alone. This type of stalker will never stalk with snow on the ground or do anything to alert someone to his presence. He also probably has Mommy issues and often lives with an overbearing mother who has left him with the complete inability to relate to women his own age. He suffers in silence. Usually has an interest in porn bordering on addiction. The suicide rate for this type of stalker is the highest of the three.

2. The Aggressive Stalker

Comes prepared in any kind of weather and already has your phone number. He dials it quite often just to hear your voice and breathes heavily, sometimes saying something mildly threatening in a poorly disguised voice. You may have had a brief, severely unhealthy relationship with this stalker at one time but that's over and he's really not getting the message. It is possible that he has a minor deformity or a flaw in his appearance that makes him somewhat of an outcast in polite society. This can mean he has the potential to be dangerous due to the way he's been poorly treated by his peers. He also usually comes from a seriously dysfunctional home life and stalking gives him a sense of peace that eludes him in his dealings with others. He has no problem taking risks and may have a minor criminal background. He may write rambling love letters to his victim as the cliche goes. He has a serious talent for making people feel uncomfortable and may not stop his stalking ways until he gets caught and a restraining order is implemented. He usually won't cause physical harm but it is a possibility. This type of stalker moves from one person to the next quite rapidly.

3. The "Just Don't Give a Fuck" Stalker

Put simply, this kind of stalker just doesn't give a fuck about his own life or the lives of others. He lives his life like a hurricane blowing through a shanty town. You know he's after you and you're a complete fucking mess. He lingers in your nightmares and leaves you in a permanent state of anxiety. He harasses your family as well. You're on a first name basis with most of the cops in your town. They visit your home at least a few times a week. The restraining order is in place but it may as well be a blank sheet of paper. This person has spent most of his adult life in prison and any remaining scraps of humanity were extinguished long ago. He also has no problem returning to jail as he prefers the company of sociopaths like himself. (Note: Not to say all criminals are sociopaths. Most though.) He would shoot your grandma in the face if she made eye contact with him for too long. OK, maybe that's a bit of an embellishment but you get the point. Basically what it comes down to is you have about a 50/50 chance of living through his wrath and if you do survive you can always hope that after he's more or less ruined your life he'll move on to someone else and let you live out the rest of your days with permanent, deeply rooted scars that no amount of therapy will fix. You can also hope that he'll end up back in jail for an unrelated crime. Good luck with this bastard. You'll need it.